The other day I found something dry and sticky on the blanket on our sofa.
As it turned out, my son was playing and eating sticky fruit loops (very sticky!) and not paying attention…
I put it in the freezer hoping to scrub it off the next day, …didn’t work.
As I was scrubbing it without any visible results, and giving my 7-year old “preaching lesson” about eating on the sofa…
he says to me: “Mommy, there is always a way, it will go off.”
Me responding: “Honey, I know. I’m trying but it seems the blanket is damaged.”
My son responding: “Mommy, nothing is impossible, you just need to try more.”
Me again: “Well, scrubbing it off doesn’t work, let me try this new soap…”
After few minutes I shout victoriously: “It’s coming off!”
My son standing next to me responding: “See mommy, I told you. Nothing is impossible. You just need to keep trying.”
I bursted laughing and leaned over towards my son and gave him a kiss on his silky, golden brown hair, saying” “You are so right, honey!”
In that moment, I knew that all the struggles I had to go through in the past,
all the stress, anxiety, being in my head,
being frustrated with life, being busy,
being sick and feeling helpless,
all that was so much needed for me to realize that
I NEEDED TO CHANGE.
I didn’t need to change just for me.
I needed to change for my kids too….
So they don’t take on my insecurities and fears but turn into happy, and confident kids with “nothing is impossible” attitude!
So, they never have to go through what I had to go through,
So, they are never left to helpless browsing online searching for help,
So, they don’t spend years feeling like they aren’t enough, trying to prove themselves,
keeping busy, because they don’t know any other way.
So many moms I talk to are living the way I was living.
- Obsessing on and on about a certain thought, not able to let go,
- Worrying about what if something bad happens today, or tomorrow to them, to their spouse, or to their kids,
- Being wrapped in their head, instead of being present with their kids,
- 24/7 living in their head, not having time, energy or willpower to do anything else beyond the basic things,
- Waking up with anxious thoughts, and staying up all night with anxious thoughts,
- Feeling not good enough, not productive enough, not smart enough…
They tell me they are worried about their kids
- who are becoming too serious for their young age,
- who are becoming less spontaneous,
- who are becoming fearful, fighting fears and worrying thoughts of their own,
- who need to be validated because they feel like they are stupid or not pretty enough,
- who have been developing obsessive behavior,
- who have been developing anxiety, ….
And those women try to FIX IT, the way they have been trying to FIX THEMSELVES,
- by putting their kids on “low dose” anti-anxiety prescriptions,
- by signing up their kids to therapy (yes, the most amazing and friendliest therapist they found),
- by encouraging their kids to be confident and to believe in themselves,
- by encouraging their kids to be more social, and to try new things..
…and none of it helps.
And you know why?
BECAUSE KIDS DON’T DO WHAT WE TELL THEM, KIDS SENSE HOW WE FEEL!
Yes, kids don’t listen to what we tell them,
kids sense WHO WE ARE.
And if we are full of limitations, negative self-talk, not being present,
wrapped in our heads, obsessing and fearful about everything,
kids sense it, and they start developing fears and demons of their own.
And soon enough, they will start a life-long journey of anxiety and fears,
A journey of countless prescriptions, wasted money and time with useless hours of therapy.
It’s not about positive thinking and self-talk,
It’s not about showing more confidence,
It’s not about being more social.
It’s about not allowing our children to develop the NEGATIVE EMOTIONAL BLUEPRINT (NEB) we have developed when we were young. And the only way how we can do it is by removing the NEB we have been carrying.
KIDS DON’T DO WHAT WE TELL THEM, KIDS SENSE HOW WE FEEL.
Removing the Negative Emotional Blueprint, the ROOT of your anxiety, fears or depression, is the KEY to your happy and healthy life!
And it’s the KEY to a happy and healthy life of your children.
I’ve seen the amazing changes in my life and the lives and attitudes of my children.
I’ve seen the amazing changes in lives of women I worked with and their children.
If you want to help your kids the right way, start helping yourself first. They will follow.
Kids’ minds work like sponges, they
absorb everything around them, the good and bad.
And that is one of the reasons women who work with me, say YES to themselves.
Because by helping themselves, their kids will not only have a happy and healthy mom and start
removing any insecurities or fears they have, but also, those moms will have the RIGHT TOOLS
to share with their children or teens if needed.